“You cannot dream yourself into a character; you must hammer and forge yourself one.” ―Henry David Thoreau
My apologies if this text is not structured, I have lots to say and I am not sure how to begin.
Did you know that May 6th to May 12th is the mental health week here in Canada? In light of this week, I would like to share with you my personal psychology analysis, and I salute you if you’re able to keep up!
We are now a few days away from having lived through half of 2019 – Congrats to us! Looking back, I started this year very miserable as I made a choice in 2018 that would completely shift my life and I was not mentally prepared for it. Although I had spent the first week of January escaping from reality in an All-inclusive trip down Mexico, I would come back to Canada to a new life – a new job, new city, new relationship status; A clean slate one would say – that I would completely hate.
My first week at work was one of the weirdest first week I ever had in all my jobs (from Sears to the Government), I won’t bore you with the details but know that all I wanted to do was to run as far as I could as quickly as I could, but I didn’t. The commute to work was also not helping, going from a 15 min drive to work to 1h-1h:30 commute was a total boner killer. I was completely lost and felt alone.
After 2-3 weeks of depressing, I decided to give myself a pep-talk on how I would get my head out of the hole. That’s when I randomly picked up my phone and looked up “be happy” on the podcast app. I had never listened to an inspiring podcast before. Although I was a pretty lame subscriber of the Duolingo language podcast and the basement yard so I thought this would be interesting! I quickly skimmed through the results until one of the cover art caught my eye… The woman on the cover was smiling carelessly, she was looking so fulfilled! , the podcast name was catchy: “Earn your happy” and the background was pink! I was hooked.
From now on, I wouldn’t spend my hour long car ride listening to useless rap/twerk/pop/country songs, I would try to nourish my brain and work on myself. For the next two weeks, I would listen to Lori Harder and her guest in the morning, and would try to apply one thing I have learned in the hour session to my work day in order to “own my happiness.“ Towards mid-February, I was feeling in control of myself, my emotions and my happiness so to top it off I started listing to Chris Harder’s podcast on my way back: “For the love of money” which I can only describe as inspirational, each guest are carefully chosen to bring an insight and their point of view on the pursuit of your true financial freedom, while making a positive impact on the world with their success. By mid-march, I was on fire, I was applying all the money mindset tricks and self-awareness I could every time I could, and it was working.
But all good things come to an end… In April, I found myself bored with my routine, I had gone through most of the podcasts I wanted to listen to and was in a better state of mind. I needed change; I needed laughter… and I found a new podcast “What’s The Tee” where RuPaul & Michelle Visage talk about anything and nothing while receiving their entertaining guests of the RuPaul Drag Race Show. I just love the energy! Right at the beginning of the podcast, it’s like a breath of fresh air and positivity and the hosts are so personally involved with the mental health subject – and health in general, that you feel connected and I could — without a doubt — listen to these two ALL DAY! To pace out my listening to RuPaul & Michelle, I would listen to an episode of the Basement yard every Monday. I was on cloud 7 – cloud 9 is a bit too high, for now, haha.
I must warn you, Joe Santagato & Danny Lopriore’s humor is not for all. So beware.
May, what can I say, I messed it all up. I learned that one thing I thought I had dealt with was not and that was going to affect my monthly budget. I went on a date, ruin my self-confidence and had stopped listening to any kind of podcast for the past week. I have not gone to any of my group gym classes in 2 weeks, and that made me feel rejected.
Today, I stumbled upon a new podcast “Relationship Advice”, I was not looking for much but I found the episode on rejection today and it has enlightened me and I have now understood how I have been treating myself and others sometimes when it comes to rejection, but also how someone may act when “rejecting” you that can leave you be a certain way. The hosts were warm and open about the subject and did not shy away from sharing their personal struggle with the subject. It was truly eye-opening.
I have been told that I tend to abruptly end my blog post. Honestly, I think my psych evolution of 2019 with insights on the podcast that has helped me through this short journey is all I had to talk about for today. I am slowly trying to be the best of me – and God knows how I have not been. I am grateful for the podcasts and their creators. I am making more self-aware choices and saying yes to mental and physical well being. I have decided that no one or nothing can or will get in the way of my happiness. There is nothing else to add.
What about you? How has your brain shifted lately? When was your last self-evaluation? Do you practice self-awareness? Do you assess your impact on your surroundings? Are you hurting people? Are you blocking your own happiness? Are you hurting yourself…?
On that note,